Twelve Visions World

Hello Mr. Hamilton- Having read thoroughly your Neothink SS and Superpuzzle manuscripts which I’ve enjoyed immensely, I found myself joting notes in light pencil along the borders with several questions. My background and therefore perspectives are somewhat different, but most issues discussed throughout I agree. I found myself last night writing out 6 pages of sincere thoughts to you by hand, but know it is not practical for someone to even want to read it, especially someone so busy as yourself, whom I’m still bewildered as to be my mentor. And writing it all out on a public web site is too personal. Please know I viewed your Meeting 01 which seemed to request any questions on the topic of Wealth & Happiness. In brief, when I was 5 years old, I was electrocuted from impoverished living conditions. Though I had a clear near death experience, my memory prior to that day and for about a year afterwards, was erased. My childhood experience was a sad and adverse one with an alcholic unresponsive father, and an emotionally unstable mother always screaming, sobbing, threatening suicide or acting out. My family was constantly moving even living in condemned places without heat, water or proper sewage. The affect on my personality as a child made me nearly mute with shyness with no self esteem or confidence. Once when I was 11, there was an after school event that I wanted to attend that cost 35 cents. It took me hours to get the courage to ask my burdened mother and when I finally did, she threw herself at the kitchen table, broke down and sobbed for over an hour because they couldn’t spare the money. I felt so bad for upsetting her, that I told myself from that day on I would never ask my parents for anything ever again, and I never did. Though both my parents worked steadily, my mother a nurse’s aid and took in ironing for $2 a basket, my father a roofer and later a janitor. My only younger sister and I took any extra job we could to help our troubled parents survive, including picking strawberries for 10 cents a pint on weekends when in season. My parents never took charity. The gifts from this kind of a childhood are that it made me a strong, self-reliant and a compassionate woman. At an early age I became my own council and compass. Without religion forced upon us, I was able to think rationally and without quilt. I have for many years believed we are one with God or GodMan. I never found any logic in religions and felt many did more harm to mankind than good. Since age 16, I have worked 2-3 jobs at a time supporting myself and many others along my path. I raised my two sons alone, one with a heart condition and ADHD, without any financial or emotional help from others, and I couldn’t give them a lot of things many other kids their ages had, but they grew up unspoiled with good work ethics. Finally in my late 30s I met the love of my life, a dear sweet man raising his two sons alone as well. The love we felt was beyond anything I’d ever felt and it spurred my lifelong creative forces to full capacity. I created many products, spent all my evenings/weekends manufacturing them till we got to the marketing steps, where only my second trade show won me Best of Show. At the same time, my dear husband was becoming very ill, and diagnosed with bone marrow cancer. I closed down all efforts of any business then, and spent the next two and half years caring for him through radiation, chemo and eventually a bone marrow trasnsplant in Seattle Veterans hospital where he died after four months. For seven years I grieved deeply, and the only thing that brought me out of that was my creativity and work. Creating brings me the greatest happiness. Through my life I have managed to educate myself somewhat, reading voraciously, teaching myself to type on a 50 cent 1928 typrwriter from a yard sale, took computer classes, created an Empowerment Workshop for Effective Women monthly for 3 years at a battered women’s shelter, worked as an Administrative Assistant to 35 environmental scientists for 4 years, put myself through 2 years of college, started my own business as an antiques/collectibles dealer specializing in antique postcards, and now for the last 13 years have worked for a wonderful auctioneer as his clerk and certified appraiser. With my own hands, I have also been able to fill my small house and yard with beauty and harmony. These are small undertakings, I know, but they have brought me peace and happiness, now at age 59. As Jessie and Angie felt happiness in the smallest things, freedom, nature, peace, and family, I relate. I have tried to live as a loving example for my family, and have always tried to live by Do unto others…and win/win for all. My question is I have also had to deal with a troubled sister diagnosed with Bipolar1 (highest degree), much like our mother was, and a grown son with many of the same behaviors. I’ve been an advocate to both in countless details of their lives, and know that these readings will be lost to them as neither reads. I may be able to spoonfeed some of these thoughts to them, I’m not sure yet. They are both loving and very hard working value producers. The only pride they get is from their hard physical efforts, and people appreciating them for that. Years ago, I realized if I encouraged them to read more, take classes, etc. it only made them feel inferior, they cannot cope with complex ideas or stress, so I stopped trying. If we love our families and feel certain members cannot join us in mentally understanding such explorative journeys, are we to give up on them or ourselves for wanting more? Cheryl